SOOOOO hard waiting

Last week, we were able to pay off one of our credit cards that we've been working towards paying on. Very exciting!! Right?

Last night I was reading one of my books that I got for Mother's Day called "1/2 Price Living", essentially about living on one income. As I was reading it, it got me thinking creatively again if there is any possible way I could even just work part time and still allow for us to get our debt paid off. The more I figured, the more I realized, no, probably not. The more I thought about that, the sadder I got about not being able to be a stay at home mommy right now.

I don't believe that every single mom out there has a calling on her life to stay at home with her children full time. I think, for myself personally, that the Lord has specifically called me home to not only be a stay at home mom, but also eventually a home schooling mom. But oh how hard it is to be patient and wait for that time to come!! I wish that I could just go to bed one night, wake up, and this period of time would be done and I could be home. I know that Ken and I are learning from the mistakes we made getting ourselves into debt the first time I was home with Hannah, and it is a hard lesson to be learned. "When we are faithful in the little things, He will entrust us with the big...."

Lord, today is a tough day. Today is a day that I don't want to be working a full time job. Today is a day that I don't care about cookbooks, or taking care of customers that call in. Today is a day that brings me a longing deep in my heart to be home with my daughter, teaching her and spending time with her, and not missing her grow up. I know that you know the desire of my heart, and I believe you have placed it there. Help me Father to daily place my focus on you where it should be, and not become bitter or frustruated with my current circumstance. Help me to remember that if we continue being faithful to obey you in this area of our lives, you will be faithful in return. I do ask Lord, that that time will come quickly, but at the same time, allow us to be able to enjoy watching Hannah grow up. Help me not to miss it. Thank you for the blessing she is to me, and the gift that you've given me in her. Bring comfort at those times I miss her the most. And use the experiences that we are going through right now to be used later to testify to your greatness and glory. Amen.